AND IT HAS BROKEN

I always believe that God works in His own mysterious ways.

I always believe in faith and destiny.

I always believe that things happen for some specific reasons.

To see things in normality is not my expertise.

To be rationale is also not something I’m good at.

Not for the past few weeks.

And to fall in love is not something I plan.

Definitely NOT.

I didn’t think it was a crime.

I didn’t think I fall in love.

I didn’t think it was happening.

I didn’t think it was real anyway.

But I did. I fall in love.

Love is God’s gift.

It is like a piece of glass.

So clean and clear.

So pure and transparent.

So beautiful and nice.

So strong and protective.

Suddenly, after a while, when you think that glass can cheer you up,

When things go out of hand,

The glass breaks.

And when it breaks, it becomes as sharp as the tip of the sword.

It cuts your skin, and bleed you heart.

And IT HAS BROKEN.

It cut through my deepest heart.

I don’t easily fall in love.

Not at all.

But when I do, I really will appreciate it.

I will take good care of it.

I will treasure every moment of it.

I will do anything to cherish it.

But like I said, I can’t handle too much love.

I don’t want to know your feelings.

I don’t want to know what you are thinking.

I don’t want to hear what you want to say.

For me, silence is better.

So, I make the decision in my silence.

Without a word and gesture.

Despite all the things I have done.

Despite the love I already poured.

Despite all the enjoyable moments I had.

I decided to leave you.

Trust me, it’s not easy to leave someone you deeply care.

Especially when you know that someone doesn’t care less about you.

Especially not someone you recently discover that you fall in love with.

Good bye.

(5.37am, 21st November 2009)