Laugh Out Loud

I had a bloody busy month. Oh, actually, monthS. Haven’t had an off-Saturdays for months. Workload, gosh, extremely mountaining!. I felt so lazy to finish up my work, thus it led to mountains of postponed jobs. At one point, I was so stressed up that I could cry out of nowhere. As in, I was driving, and suddenly I cried. Bodoh tak?? Really, it was a sign of hypertension.

The boyfriend of mine (or should I say man-friend?? Huhu, sounds like a puppy..owh, pakcik..that’s wut I called him sumtimes…) is a kind of guy who always makes jokes, but I asked him to stop teasing me (which was what he always did when we were together) because I couldn’t laugh at any jokes at that moment. Well, actually, WOULDN’T laugh at all!! I asked him to just sit and listen to wutever babbling I wanted to say and to just agree with me. I asked him to stop debating with me about some political issues because I didn’t care less. I was so depressed that I laid myself on the bed, hugging my bantal busuk for few hours and that was it. No music, no intention to get a nap, no answering the phone calls. Nothing.

So, Pakcik noticed my depression (I guess). So, wut he brought me to The Curve. Frankly, I already lived in KL for quite sumtime, but this is the place I have never been to. There’s a Cineleisure sumwhere there and he straight away bought us movie tickets for Fast and Furious 4 at the Platinum Movie Suites. It was RM40 per seat, ok. Giler mahal. I have just gotten my backdated gaji and all which total up tp RM6k but I still considered RM40 for a movie ticket was nonsense. But Pakcik said, it’s a little treat for me.

When we went in, there was internet, drinks and Osim’s massage chair which I LOVE very very very much. I have never liked to be massaged at, but this Osim chair was such a turn-on. So relaxing.

Then, we watched the movie. Of course the seats were spacious, fancy and all. But it didn’t stroke my eyes. I have been to Gold Class and Premier Class few times before. Biase je sbnrnyer.. Nothing so high class sgt pun. It was just the massage chair that got into my mind.

Then, we had our dinner and walked around that place. I felt happy and clam for a while. Pakcik listened to every single bit of what I was saying. He knew how we liked to do movie reviewing, which was wut we did. I wanted Baskin Robbins’ ice-cream which I haven’t had for quite some time. It was my first BR in 5 YEARS!!!

Then Pakcik said, ‘I tell u wut, let’s catch midnite movie pulak. We’ll watch KNOWING’.

Wut?? My god, I haven’t done movie marathon for quite sum time, especially with this man I was standing with. But I declined because I was too tired from the jogging and aerobics earlier in the evening.

The thing is, how often u get a man who would do many things just to cheer u up? I didn’t get it at all, not until the last 5 years. He does things in a spontaneous calming way, no romantic cliché’ like big bouquet of roses or jiwang karat wordings in a card. He is the most annoying guy I have ever met. Extremely annoying and menyakitkan hati. Seriously, no kidding. We can fight like nobody’s business.

But he’s my shoulder to cry. He’s my best friend. I love him dearly. I don’t understand why God is making our relationship so difficult.

Everyone has done some mistakes, so do us. But we improve, a lot. why relationship seems easier to other people but not to us. I guess God works in His mysterious ways.

But I prepare, I prepare if this is not the one. Well, I will cry for weeks of course, and I might do some stupid things, but I prepare. I have seen many broken marriages, so I believe there’s always an ending. What I am not prepared is to date other guy, or to make other relationship. I don’t thing I have the guts to do that. Maybe not now.

The thing is, I am quite happy now. I mean, sumtimes of course there are things that get into your mind, but I like the way I live my life now. I like the way my relationship works. If getting to another step means breaking my parents’ heart, making some people unhappy, and giving other people another point to gossip about, why should you take another step??

While everyone is making judgement about my relationship, I don’t give a damn. I have my own way to settle my things. It might work, it might not, but it is none of other people’s business. If it works, you may pass, but if it doesn’t, be my guess to laugh at me out loud.